It’s coming on Christmas
They’re cutting down trees
Putting up reindeer
Singing songs of joy and peace

Oh, I wish I had a river
I could skate away on

But it don’t snow here
It stays pretty green
I’m gonna make a lot of money
And then quit this crazy scene

Oh, I wish I had a river
I could skate away on

I wish I had a river so long
I’d teach my feet to fly
Oh, I wish I had a river
I could skate away on

I made my baby cry
She tried hard to help me, putting me at ease
Loved me so naughty
It made me weak at the knees

Oh, I wish I had a river
I could skate away on

I’m so hard to handle
I’m selfish and I’m sad
Gone and lost the best baby
That I ever had

Oh, I wish I had a river
I could skate away on

I wish I had a river so long
I’d teach my feet to fly

Oh, I wish I had a river
I could skate away on
I made my baby say goodbye

It’s coming on Christmas
They’re cutting down trees
Putting up reindeer
Singing songs of joy and peace

Oh, I wish I had a river
I could skate away on

I wish it would snow. I miss that cold, pure white. I wanna watch it fall. To me, it’s not winter without it. I’m sitting with Marie wrapped in my arms, she’s my favourite Christmas present. We’re sitting in the window seat in our room, in our underwear. Marie’s fast asleep, her peaceful breathin’ is kinda comfortin’. She knows I get kinda unsettled at Christmas, all this togetherness shit, makes me wonder about my family, my roots, where I came from. Well shit, unless they grew me in a fuckin’ jar, I must have parents, I gotta be somebody’s child, even the Wolverine had a mother.

Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate all the geeks have done for me and I owe the Professor a debt bigger than my life, but the X-men ain’t my family, not really. The only place I feel at home is with Marie, her tiny body soft against mine.

But as I stare out the window, things play on my mind. I worry about shit. Mostly little things, but sometimes I think about the whole fuckin’ world. I wonder if I can ever justify bringin’ mine and Marie’s child into a place so damn violent. I mean, I look at the things that have happened to Marie and the shit that was done to me and I question how evil can exist in such beautiful surroundings. And then I realise. Everything in nature is innocent. Beautiful. It’s only the crap that man has put on this earth that is ugly. Wars, poverty, disease, hate. We do it to each other every fuckin’ day, without a second thought. We trample over other people for what we think we want, need, we’re all killers and we cause torture that we won’t even live long enough to see the consequences of. Well, I might.

I’m startin’ to think about this shit a lot, more since I met Marie, maybe I’m learnin’ from her about compassion or somethin’, but I think ‘bout the pain those bastards caused me and the pain we cause each other. All in the name of fuckin’ politics and religion and the pursuit of power. And when I think about all that crap, it makes me look at the world as a real shitty, unpredictable place, where there’s nothin’ to depend on.

But you know what, I’m wrong. Totally and utterly fuckin’ wrong.

There are some things in life you can depend on. Apart from the claws! Things that seem fuckin’ small and obsolete to everyone else, but to you, they’re the centre of the universe. I can rely on myself, the fact I choose what I do and what I don’t and what I’m responsible for. I’m responsible for somethin’ fuckin’ precious. I’m responsible for the woman I love, I made a vow, a promise, that I’ll deliver, and she can rely on that. I can rely on her, I can rely on this strange group of people to help me keep her safe and to fight for both of us.

And above all, and don’t you dare fuckin’ laugh, I can rely on love. Yeah love. I can rely on the fact that I am loved. I know love is real, ‘cause I feel it when Marie kisses me and takes my hand in hers, I see it when One-Eye looks at Jean, I know it when Storm gives me friendly advice on stuff with Marie and I hear it in Xavier’s words when he fuckin’ lectures me. I know what you’re thinkin’, the Wolverine has been reduced to an even less intimidatin’ version of Lassie, but fuck you all, I don’t give a shit if you think it’s trivial, or pointless to think that one simple emotion can counteract a world overflowing with grief, betrayal, terror and confusion.

But don’t you fuckers get it, that’s what makes love so powerful. More powerful than any weapon, any action, man, woman or word. Emotions rule everyone, regardless of language or race. To know love is to know happiness, to be fulfilled. Marie taught me that too fuckin’ well. And I pity the soul that don’t understand that.

And that is why I’m more than fuckin’ content to lie here, with my sleeping lover cradled in my arms, while an insane world rages outside. ‘Cause I know that because I’m loved, if the world should end tomorrow, I’ll die with a fuckin’ smile face.